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Memories

by on March 22, 2013

This story was written for Trifecta’s weekend prompt, in which they asked us to take three words, “rain”, “rebellion”, and “remember”, and add 33 of our own. This scene stuck in my mind, though it was a bit more involved at first. Condensing things down to 33 words is somewhat tricky. I may build on it later. Anywho. Roll film!

Rain glanced up from her desk as the ragged ‘bot approached and spit paper at her. She waved it away dismissively. She wasn’t interested in their silly rebellion. Couldn’t they remember what happened last time? Honestly.

 

 

 

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From → 1. Volcano Rain

45 Comments
  1. We wrote in the same vein! I love the clear voice, even in such a short piece.

    • So we did! I loved yours as well. An army of cybermen rusting because they forgot oil….nice. 🙂

  2. I love it! You made me giggle. Well done.

    • Thanks! Ironically this didn’t start out to be a humor piece, I was going to go for unbearably tragic. Then Rain just kinda took over.

  3. Ha! This is great. I think you did a great job creating a very vivid scene, incidentally – no additional words needed!

    • Thanks; I’m glad to know the word count worked alright. Micro-fiction is tricky, especially when one’s gotten used to NaNoWriMo where the object is to get as many words as possible, not the other way round.

  4. love that her name is RAIN. Of course!
    this was silly, funny and an almost spooky peek into the future too.

    have a great weekend !

    • I read a Star Wars novel with a character named Rain once. She went on to be a powerful Sith sorcerer. She was anything but silly. I like mine better. 🙂

  5. You never fail, Michael!

  6. The last line is priceless.

    • My story characters tend to say “Honestly” a lot, I’ve noticed. I think I got that from Hermione.

  7. I love that you named your heroine Rain. 🙂 Nice deviation.

    • I’ve always wanted to name a heroine Rain, ever since I saw that name used for a Star Wars character who was anything but a heroine. Kinda wanted to redeem it. 😛

  8. Yes….exactly, rise up, then get trampled down. Well done.

  9. Neat use of the prompt(s) really imaginative.

  10. This is great! I love that you used rain as a name – and I love the tone and the humour!

    • Thanks! Rain’s definitely a cool name; I may keep her around just because of that. 🙂

  11. So clever, to use Rain as her name. Nice. Well done

  12. I love your take on this prompt! Rain sounds like someone I would get along with fabulously… 😉

  13. I like that you used Rain as a name. And the slight note of sarcasm.

    • Sarcasm’s fun to write. When you get someone really upset and they go off on a tear, the words just flow. 🙂

  14. This is really good. I like the way you made Rain a name. You really breathed some life into these three words! Excellent!

  15. I loved the innovative use of Rain! Great little gig.

    • Thanks! Her name’s quite popular; I should think about giving her a last name too. 😛

  16. kymminbarcelona permalink

    Love the snark!

  17. Lance permalink

    I like the humorous creative take. well done.

  18. Good story.

  19. oscarjamieson permalink

    Fantastic little piece, love her dismissive nature.

  20. Ooo I like this rain (: Great job!

  21. In 36 words, you certainly took everyone somewhere in the future with an identifiable reaction we all have had. Good job. http://annbennett2.blogspot.com

  22. You know in India we have a lot of girls who are named “Varsha”, meaning Rain:-)So this made me feel right at home & ofc the subtle humour tickled me no end.Well done:-)

    • It’s a lovely name; I think we in America should use it more often. If I ever get married and have a girl, I’m going to suggest it. 🙂

  23. Oh I love this – stroppy little ‘bot.

  24. Love it! =) I like the simplicity of the “story” and the attitude in these last lines: “She wasn’t interested in their silly rebellion. Couldn’t they remember what happened last time? Honestly.” Just wonderful!

  25. Love how you mixed it up with Rain. Perfect.

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