Skip to content

Eulalie’s Dilemma

by on August 14, 2013

This story was written for Trifecta’s weekly prompt, and occurs in the Third Little Pig universe. I think Eulalie and Evinrude deserve each other. 🙂

Lady Eulalie was greatly distressed. The duke of her island colony had gone and married his son off to some random scullery maid instead of her, all because the scullery maid had gotten her foot into a shoe and Eulalie hadn’t. Now the scullery maid was a duchess, and Lady Eulalie was still only Lady Eulalie, all because of ill-fitting footwear! It would have been farcical, if it weren’t so tragic.

So Eulalie had set sail and ridden carriage and even (shudder) slept in common roadside inns, certain that Prince Evinrude would set things right when she reached him. But now, after all her trouble, the prince couldn’t be found. The Lord Chamberlain was quite apologetic, but he really had no idea where Evinrude was. The castle servants had looked everywhere with no luck.

“Well,” Eulalie said frostily, “they obviously weren’t looking hard enough. The prince must be somewhere. I see I shall have to look myself. And when I find him, I shall have words with him about the appalling inattentiveness of his staff! You may lose a button, or a handkerchief, or a spool of thread, but, Lord Chamberlain, you cannot lose a prince!”

She swept off in high outrage into the castle corridors. Some time later, when her wrath had cooled a bit, Eulalie realized that she had no idea into which corridor she had swept, nor how to get back. She was about to call for help when suddenly Evinrude himself came running into the hallway, a drawn sword in his hand. He hardly even noticed her; indeed, his eyes were fixed on the other end of the corridor. Eulalie followed his gaze.

“AYIEEEEEE! A GIANT SNAKE!” she shrieked, displaying an admirable grasp of the obvious. Eulalie suddenly wished she had stayed comfortably on her island, the shoe problem notwithstanding.

Advertisements
17 Comments
  1. “All because of ill-fitting footwear!” made me laugh out loud. Love it.

    • Thanks for the comment; I am glad when people actually laugh out loud when reading a story. 🙂

  2. I can see where Eulalie feels she has a legitimate complaint. I’ve always been a bit suspicious about how one keeps her foot inside a glass slipper anyway…think of the foot sweat!!!! ewwwwwwwww!!!!!!!!!!

    • I hadn’t thought of that. Those things seem more impractical the more one thinks about them. What was the Fairy Godmother thinking?

  3. …and this is what happens when you go chasing men 🙂

  4. Draug419 permalink

    What a wonderfully amusing take on a fairy tale.

  5. All of this trouble from one little shoe. And I thought trying to find a shoe that fits was hard enough!
    Thank you very much for linking up. Please remember to return to vote!

  6. Fun! I love fairytales. I wonder how this one will end?

  7. I wish this could be a cautionary tale for people- You know what happens when you act like a snooty bossy pants, missy? GIANT SNAKES.

    • I’m reminded of an exchange in a season two episode of Buffy.
      “Buffy: I told one lie, I had one drink.
      Giles: Yes, and you were very nearly devoured by a giant demon snake. The words “let that be a lesson” are a tad redundant at this juncture.”

  8. I love your re-imagined fairy tales! Love the ill-fitting footwear line – not to mention Lady Auralie’s admirable grasp of the obvious.

    And now I’m suffering from Buffy nostalgia. Giles had some of the best lines.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Laissez Faire

Letting Life Lead

Delight Through Logical Misery

Taking the sayings,thoughts and themes that make us happy and ruining them with science and logic and then ...um...happiness might come from that. Or at least some sort of smugness that's very similiar.

I Miss You When I Blink

and other classics

rarasaur

frightfully wondrous things happen here.

That Darn Kat

curiouser and curiouser

It's Not About A Church

It's about following Jesus ...

Erin McCole Cupp

Faith, Fiction, and Love No Matter What

that cynking feeling

You know the one I'm talking about . . .

The Cordial Catholic

Cordially explaining the Catholic faith.

The History of Love

The Trials & Tribulations of English Romance, 1660–1837

polysyllabic profundities

Random thoughts with sporadically profound meaning

Stewartry

Book reviews and general nonsense

Peg-o-Leg's Ramblings

You say you want an evolution...

Ned's Blog

Humor at the Speed of Life

%d bloggers like this: