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Saturday Musings

by on August 17, 2013

Next week begins my third year in law school. Among my classes this term is “Law and Literature”. The selection of stories we’ll be discussing includes Antigone, The Lottery, the Book of Jonah, “Harrison Bergeron”…..and part of the grade is based on writing an original short story.  Say, Mr. Law Professor, might I introduce you to a girl named Catrina?  😀

Needless to say, I am fairly excited about this term. Of course, earlier today I was in some emotional distress, mainly because I rewatched Serenity. That is one good movie. But I admit,  I was a bit reluctant to watch it, because there are some terribly sad moments. But then, there’s some terribly awesome moments too.  One of my favorite moments in any movie ever, for instance….well, I won’t spoil it for those of you who haven’t seen it, but let’s just say the bad guy’s expression goes from smirk to stunned disbelief in about two seconds. And it is good.

I suppose this post should have some substance before I finish, so I thought I’d return to a classic blogging subject: spam. Lately I’ve been wondering whether the spammers who visit my blog are really free-verse modern poets trying to share their creative genius with the world. For instance, here’s one comment I recently received.

Howcome just have pc sitting there,
unused in the exploration?
Pierce Brosnan, as Bond, wore a quantity totally different designs of the
Seamaster.
Ruby Season four Episode 5 is just now ready to give you 100% Tv
For pc entertainment.
Electro-mechanical watches utilize electricity at a injury
Spring

Now, I’m lousy at literary criticism. I think sometimes a whale is just a whale. (I also think, incidentally, that Moby Dick is vastly overrated. It’s a whaling encyclopedia with an occasional plot thrown in.)  And I shudder to think what future literature scholars will say about my work. (“So, what do you think the Zombie Penguin Apocalypse symbolizes here?”)  But I thought I’d try my hand at this clearly meaningful work presented by a person who, sadly, prefers to remain anonymous.
The first line, for instance, “howcome just have pc sitting there, unused in the exploration”? A question I ask myself every day. Do we really use our PCs, or laptops, or other computer devices for exploration, for gaining knowledge and enlightenment, or are they just sitting there, unused?  Tragic.

And then the next part, “Pierce Brosnan, as Bond, wore a quantity totally different designs of the Seamaster.”   Our mysterious writer, facing the ennui of unused technology and unexplored worlds, ventures into film criticism. But even here, he finds no meaning. Pierce Brosnan, the Bond of the 90s, is indeed totally different from the Bond of today, a Bond that’s much grimmer, darker even, like the sea. A seamaster, unmoored from solid ground of truths everybody understood, still trying to find certainty in a rapidly changing world.
So our writer goes on, “Ruby Season four Episode 5 is just now ready to give you 100% Tv for pc entertainment.”.   I had to do some research on this one. Clearly the writer is referring to Ruby, an American reality-documentary series formerly on the Style channel, which addressed the struggles of a woman attempting to lose weight. The writer refers to a specific episode, “Ruby’s Beach Meltdown”, in which, as Wikipedia informs me, the titular character finds that she has not succeeded in her weight-loss efforts. The writer of this free-verse poem may have identified with Ruby in her fight, and was ready for more entertainment, even thrilling heroics, but….Ruby has, it seems, been canceled. The writer must have been terribly distressed.  Film and television has failed, the world is unsure, everything is disappearing. But then…
“Electro-mechanical watches utilize electricity at a injury.”  Yes. Yes they do. Even after a terrible blow, an injury if you will, watches still keep on going, utilizing their inner spark. You might say they take a lickin’ and keep on tickin’. And so, I think our writer must have taken solace in that, because the poem concludes with a single word. “Spring”.  Ah, spring. The embodiment of hope, the promise of new life, even after the darkest winter.  Truly, this poem is a masterpiece of hidden emotion and deep meaning.

….

Or it’s just some random phrases thrown together with a link that would probably give my computer a horrid virus if I were so foolish as to click on it .Which I didn’t.  But still….I like to think it’s an epic poem. 🙂

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2 Comments
  1. I had never thought of breaking down and analysing the spam I receive, and you did it in such a creative manner. 🙂

    • It’s remarkable what diamonds are hidden in the rough of spam, so to speak. 🙂

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