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In Which Steven is Not Careful About What He Wishes For

by on December 10, 2013

This story was written for Trifecta’s weekly prompt, and is also another entry in Constance’s Story. To sum up what’s happened so far, Constance is a former treasure-hunter turned guardian angel, who had unfortunately lost one of her charges, Amy, in a tragic bus accident. She decided to get Amy back, as Amy had only just got married to Steven. Unfortunately, Amy came back all wrong…

Steven was having an exceptionally bad day. His formerly dead wife Amy was lurching towards him, moaning in fine zombie fashion, her undead feet squelching in the mud of the cemetery. This was alarming in itself; what was even more alarming was the woman who had popped in from nowhere exclaiming about having resurrected Amy.

“You what?” Steven said. “And who the heck are you, anyway?”

“I’m Constance, I’m your guardian angel, and honestly I totally didn’t mean for her to come back this way!”

“Well, she did!” Steven exclaimed, backpedaling to avoid Amy’s clutches. “And you’re not much help, are you? Where were you when she got run over by the freakin’ bus?”

“Like that was my fault?” Constance snapped. “I can’t be everywhere, you know!”

“So you made up for that by making her a zombie, is that it? Heck of a job, there, angel.”

Constance flew into a most unangelic fury. “Oh, you melt my heart, you really do.  You’re worse than my loathsome squid ex-boyfriend.  If it weren’t for me, you and Amy wouldn’t even have met!”

“And maybe if that hadn’t happened, she’d still be alive!” Steven shot back. “Honestly, I wish you’d just left us alone!”

“I- wait.”  A sudden mad gleam came into Constance’s eye. “I’ve wanted to do this since I got the halo. Fine. You have your wish. I left you alone.”

There was a sudden flash. Zombie Amy disappeared. So did Constance. The cemetery was quiet as churchmice. Steven ran to a spot he’d come to know all too well. The headstone was gone. “She’s alive…” Steven whispered to himself, in profound relief. Whatever had just happened, maybe things would come out all right now.

Then he heard a distant boom, followed by the clanging metallic roar. Steven spun around, just in time to see a gigantic green monster rampaging merrily across the horizon. “Hey, angel?” he said. “I think I changed my mind!”

She didn’t answer. The green rage monster barreled on.

  1. ym1611 permalink

    Haha, this is too much fun 😀 Loved it!

  2. Funny – this is cute 🙂 Thanks for linking up!

  3. You never said, but I’m pretty sure this takes place on a Monday. Yeah, definitely a Monday 🙂 I’m enjoying Constance and her ability to muck everything up…makes for good reading!

  4. *hahaha* Fantastic! This story is so much fun – a real treat to read.

  5. KymmInBarcelona permalink

    Wow, did that serve him right or what!?!
    Funny man.

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