Skip to content

The Penguin Who Knocks

by on June 21, 2014

The Malevolent Med-Student was in a fume. He had so many brilliant plans. Yet, every time he tried to carry them out, he always found himself snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. It didn’t help matters that his sidekick, Candystriper, was a perpetual loony who believed that she was advised on ethical issues by an invisible winged manatee named Marcia who lived over her left shoulder. Not to mention, Edison City was just crawling with superheroes: Captain Happily Married, Super Soccer Mom, Meg Atomic, the Incredible Postman, and Mr. Ecosystem, just to name a few and not counting sidekicks. Apparently there wasn’t any other city in the world that needed caped protection, oh no. It just had to be this one. Always.

He’d thought tonight would be different. The Rogue Jaywalker had sworn up and down that this abandoned old warehouse contained an artifact of ancient power. The Malevolent Med-Student had planned to seize it, and then wield its power to challenge the superheroes and take over the world. Candystriper had diverted the capes by staging a robbery of a downtown bank. (At least, that was the plan. Actually, she had decided to convert the whole thing into an impromptu stage musical, with the security guards pressed into service as backup dancers). Meanwhile, the Malevolent Med-Student had broken into the warehouse. He had spent an hour searching through dusty corridors, to no avail. He had nearly decided on renunciation of the project, when he entered the last corridor and found the box he was seeking. Quickly the Malevolent Med-Student tore it open with a crowbar. Then he gaped. “What…what is this? This isn’t an ancient artifact! This is just a useless piece of ironmongery!”

It wasn’t entirely useless. It was a perfectly good door knocker. It wasn’t actually attached to a door, to be sure, but if it had been, it would’ve worked wonderfully. Still, it looked like just an ordinary door knocker. It wasn’t made of kryptonite, or cuendillar, or adamantium. When the Malevolent Med-Student touched it, he wasn’t suddenly transported into another dimension. Nor did it start glowing and summon the wrath of God to melt his face off. It just lay there in his hand. He sighed. Once again, it looked like a waste of an evening.

He decided to take the door knocker anyway, as a souvenir. He made his way back to the door of the warehouse, and pulled it open, prepared to slip out quietly into the night, Then he stopped. Before him was a penguin. A penguin with a nasty look, and an unpleasant smell. Indeed, it hardly looked alive at all. Then it clicked its beak and let out a horrible squawk, and the Malevolent Med-Student realized. It wasn’t alive. It was a zombie penguin! “Good heavens,” he exclaimed. “What foul aquatic necromancy is this?”

Then the zombie penguin, hearing his voice, flung itself down and began to paw at the ground before him. The Malevolent Med-Student smiled. He could think off all sorts of potential uses for the ability to command an army of zombie penguins. The evening had not been wasted after all.

I wrote this story in response to a writing challenge presented at Miriam Joy Writes, in which the idea was to use several random words like ironmongery and necromancy. I hadn’t written an adventure of the Malevolent Med-Student and Candystriper in a while. This seemed the perfect opportunity.

Advertisements

From → Uncategorized

3 Comments
  1. Entertaining! Those are hard words to work into a story… only you could bring zombie penguins into it, haha 🙂

  2. Well, this was an excellent return to this story line, in my humble opinion. AND – you earned your Jordan Reference Badge for ‘cuendillar’, well done 🙂

Trackbacks & Pingbacks

  1. Dress Like You’re Nine Different People | Miriam Joy Writes

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Laissez Faire

Letting Life Lead

Delight Through Logical Misery

Taking the sayings,thoughts and themes that make us happy and ruining them with science and logic and then ...um...happiness might come from that. Or at least some sort of smugness that's very similiar.

I Miss You When I Blink

and other classics

rarasaur

frightfully wondrous things happen here.

That Darn Kat

curiouser and curiouser

It's Not About A Church

It's about following Jesus ...

Erin McCole Cupp

Faith, Fiction, and Love No Matter What

that cynking feeling

You know the one I'm talking about . . .

The Cordial Catholic

Cordially explaining the Catholic faith.

The History of Love

The Trials & Tribulations of English Romance, 1660–1837

polysyllabic profundities

Random thoughts with sporadically profound meaning

Stewartry

Book reviews and general nonsense

Peg-o-Leg's Ramblings

You say you want an evolution...

Ned's Blog

Humor at the Speed of Life

%d bloggers like this: